Help Young Minds

Let’s think of Valentine’s Day for a second. What comes to mind?

“Ugh, cheesy couples make me wanna throw up”

“Valentine’s day is just a slap in the face for all of us singles”

“I just want to stuff my face with chocolates, ice cream, while I watch crappy chick flicks until I fall asleep just so this day is over”

We’ve all heard these phrases on TV, movies, Youtube videos-–heck, even in real life. And that’s because there’s this common hatred towards Valentine’s Day. You see, over the years, February 14th has been molded into this day to celebrate romantic love: Take your special one out on a date, confess your love to your crush, happy couples, love love love!!! And it’s all very in your face and even annoying.

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But not annoying for the reasons you’re thinking about.

You see, Valentine’s Day IS a celebration of love. But it is of ALL kinds of love.

In Mexico, Panama, Puerto Rico and other parts of Latin America, Valentine’s Day is typically called “The Day of Love and Friendship”. While couples also give each other chocolates, flowers, and other shows of affection, it is also customary to gift your friends with candy, something you know they like, etc. In my experience (I was born and raised in Mexico), high schools even take it further and organize a gift-exchange among students in the same classroom, in an attempt to celebrate comradery and help the students make more friends. We would end the day with lots of delicious chocolate, heart-shaped lollipops, and even one or two bouquets, a handwritten letter from our friend — just nice stuff we were able to enjoy at that moment or save as a souvenir of that day.

One of my favorite things about that day was going out with my friends after school. We would go to a cool burger or pizza place, hang out, and if our parents allowed us (and it was the weekend), we would have a sleepover! And while there would be lots of couples around, to us, that day was to celebrate the love we had for each other as friends. Celebrating the uniqueness of our friend group, being together and doing the things we enjoyed the most.

I had an idea of how Valentine’s Day wasn’t really like that in the United States and Canada, but only learned the full details of it once I moved here.

February 14th, 2021 was my first “Day of Love and Friendship” away from home. I didn’t have my friends to celebrate, nor the heart-shaped lollipops to give out, but I was excited to share that day with my roommate—my newest friend at the time– and her own girlfriends. She organized a brunch at our place, and when everyone gathered around the table, there was this weird energy. A negative energy. Then, one of them said that she wanted to get distracted with anything just so the day would go by quickly. That saddened me, because I was so happy to have a day to enjoy my new friends in this new life I had started in Canada. So I explained to them how this day is seen where I’m from. And almost immediately, the energy wasn’t weird anymore–it was happy and exciting! When everyone realized just how much more broader the “celebration of love” is, it’s almost as if they allowed themselves to relax and just enjoy the company. And I thought “I hope they pass along this feeling. I hope the entire world eventually realizes what a beautiful day Valentine’s Day is. Because it is annoying how limiting the common perception of this day is”.

So here I am, telling you.

The dictionary defines love as “an intense feeling of affection”. Pretty general, right? And isn’t that what we feel for our family, our friends, our pets, and all those special to us? We can even feel it towards us (self-love). Love is a “spectrum”, and so it should be celebrated as such—-in multiple ways! So if you have someone with whom you share romantic feelings—-great! Celebrate that. But if you don’t, remember you also have your best friends, and your bond deserves to be acknowledged in a special way. And if, for some reason, you are away from your friends, and you find yourself being alone on February 14th, you can take that as an opportunity to celebrate yourself and the wonders of self-love. Take yourself out to dinner, watch your favorite movie, try a new activity. The options are endless.

It’s so easy to exclude ourselves from a celebration known as a day to be with your special one. But let’s not forget that Valentine’s day has always been about us, about everyone, and the beauty that is love in all its shapes and forms.

Have fun and stay safe and healthy, Brilliant Minds!

- Andrea